The Bellowing of Cain: HOPE for Those Who’ve Blown It

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Jeremy Gordon Grinnell

It’s a strange form of Christianity that would deny that perpetrators of evil can be redeemed.

The Bellowing of Cain was written primarily to those who, like Cain, have made horrible life-wrecking decisions and secondarily to those who have a calling to live and work with them. It is written by a fellow traveler who understands what it means to destroy one’s life… for he once did so.

In the culture of disposable people, we need a book like The Bellowing of Cain to teach us about the unique journey taken by people with such baggage – baggage like shame, loss, and remorse. Such luggage is heavy and bends the back of those who must carry it, and they often walk alone. Who will speak for them?

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AUTOGRAPHEDBooks ordered here on our website are SIGNED by the author!



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Editorial Reviews

“I couldn’t put this book down. As one who has been betrayed, I longed to understand: How could someone who claimed to love me fail to see and hear my pain? How could they lose all feeling for me? How could I have prevented this from happening? Am I to blame? Through his own excruciating journey as the betrayer, Jeremy courageously explains what I wanted to know: exactly how sin hardened his heart, diminishing everyone he cared about and deafening him to their cries. Until Jeremy turned back to the Lord, he was blind to the ones he had loved the most. This is an important book about the deadly grip of sin, the gift and process of repentance, and the overwhelming, unending love of God.”

– Vaneetha Rendall Risner – Author, Walking Through Fire (Thomas Nelson)

“The Bellowing of Cain is a compelling story of someone who, through his sin, damaged his own life and the lives of others. That story, in itself, isn’t unusual. What’s unique is Jeremy Grinnell’s willingness to tell with unflinching candor his story of failure and shame so that others might benefit from his hard-won wisdom and enter more deeply into the reality of God’s extravagant grace. This is a must-read book which will stretch and enlarge our imagination for what restoration and redemption can look like in the body of Christ.”

– Sharon Garlough Brown – Author, Sensible Shoes (IVP) and Shades of Light (IVP)

“I see this memoir as instructive reading for self-examination, especially for those in ministry. For example: ‘This is how it starts.’ ‘This is how you get sucked in.’ ‘This is what self-deception sounds like.’ ‘This is how deep the betrayal feels to your family and community.’ ‘This is how long the suffering can last and how dark the night can feel,’ but also ‘this is how the light comes.’ ‘This is what redemption and reconciliation can look like.’”

– Rebecca Konyndyk-Deyoung – Author, Glittering Vices (Brazos) and Vainglory: The Forgotten Vice (Eerdmans)

Additional information

Weight .31 lbs
Dimensions 8.5 × 0.41 × 5.5 in

Books ordered here on our website are SIGNED by the author!

About the Author

Dr. Jeremy Gordon Grinnell earned his Ph.D. in Systematic Theology and taught theology at an evangelical seminary for nearly fifteen years. He was also the preaching pastor at a growing non-denominational church.

In 2013, he struggled through an emotional affair combined with near-fatal clinical depression. In fifteen seconds of folly, he threw it all away in the most public way possible―complete with invasion of privacy charges and public disgrace in the media.

A decade later, his marriage and family have been restored. He’s been reconciled to the congregation he failed, periodically preaching there, and is now in the ordination process with the Wesleyan Church in preparation for whatever God has next for him.



Additional Formats

Also available on Amazon in paperback, eBook (Kindle), & audiobook (Audible).








8.5 x 0.41 x 5.5 inches


St. Asinus Publishing


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